This Is the Correct Way to Layer Condiments on a Burger

It's summer time – we've finally reached the season of long nights, gorgeous weather, and the best thing of all: eating al fresco. Barbecues, cookouts, even just picnics where someone's had enough foresight to bring a small fire to roast things in the park… I truly believe that finding ways to make eating outside more enjoyable is humanity's sole purpose.

That said, there is a right way to eat burgers, and as someone who has eaten many burgers and been disappointed almost as many times, I have very strong feelings about this. Keep reading for the right way to use condiments in your burger.

Mayonnaise: Out of sight and out of mind

Let's understand this condiment's reason for being; it's for mouthfeel, not flavor. I always spread mayonnaise on my burger buns like butter, and maybe an extremely light touch on the patty for slip if necessary. There's nothing more heartbreaking than ordering a burger and having it arrive drenched in white.

Ketchup: Time for a change-up

This might be where I lose you, because if tomato ketchup has a million haters, then I am one of them. If ketchup has 10 haters, then I am one of them. If ketchup has only one hater, then that is me. If the world is for ketchup (and it is in a way that makes life very difficult), then I am against the world, which is why it pains me to admit that the perfect burger always has to have a tomato-based element.

There just has to be something tangy and sweet to cut through the richness of the meat (or plant-based patty; your mileage may vary). But let's branch out – ketchup is so overplayed! Heapings of sriracha is my personal go-to, especially if you're in a pinch and haven't got any onions. I also really enjoy the spicy kick it adds, because for someone who would add hot sauce to her breakfast cereal if she could, I'm often reluctant to add it to burgers — it's a case of "Use in Emergency" (emergency being that only ketchup and mayonnaise are available). Tomato relish would also work really well here!

Mustard: Keep it simple, if you must

If you have to go for a mustard, yellow mustard only and mix it with whatever tomato sauce you're using. Fancier does not always equal better!

Barbecue Sauce: Matching is everything

I've come to realize that anything I feel about barbecue sauce is hampered by the fact that I'm from London and not Texas, or South Africa, or some other place in the world with a strong tradition of going all out marinating meat and cooking it over fire. With that caveat out of the way, I think barbecue sauce works perfectly in burgers if it's the kind the meat has been cooked in. Adding it as a condiment straight from the bottle is a truly "meh" experience.

Pickle Juice: The secret weapon

Does this count as a condiment? A garnish? An ingredient? Who knows! Either way, a couple teaspoonfuls of pickle juice on your burger buns before you either toast or steam them just adds a little je ne sais quoi to the bread; a little dazzle!

How to layer your condiments–a highly subjective but deeply effective strategy

Ready for Garen's Perfect Burger Assembly? Here we go!

1. Prepare your onions: Sweat/fry your onions until they're soft. Take off heat and set to the side.
2. Cook your burger: Cook the burger in the same oil, if you're working the stove (if you're grilling, don't worry about this step).
3. Prepare your buns: During the last few minutes of cooking, pop some pickle juice on your buns and toast them (both brioche and American sesame).
4. Assemble your burger:Take both burgers and buns out of heat and assemble thusly:
   • Spread mayonnaise on both buns (remember it's for feel and not taste!)
   • Spread some sriracha on bottom bun
   • Put patty on bottom bun and layer your components in this order: a single slice of American cheese, pickles, onions, some more sriracha.
5. Add some heat: If you're using American sesame buns, you're done! If you're using brioche, wrap your assembled burger in foil and put back into the heat for 2-7 minutes, depending on the temperature of your grill (or oven). The components will meld together in that take-out way that's usually impossible to achieve at home, and the brioche will soften perfectly in the steam